Image: Beyza Durmuş
Becoming a Grandma Isn’t What It Used to Be—And Neither Are the Names
Not “girl.” Not “sweetie.” And maybe not “Nana,” either.
When I became a grandmother, I realized this might be the first time in my life I got to choose the grandma name everyone would call me—without anyone’s input but my own. Not my parents. Not my husband. Not the boss who called me “Janet’s new girl” on my first day at a new company. I was 42. I had a college degree, a job, and a teenager—but sure, “girl” worked for him.
We’ve all been named, labeled, and even diminished in the names that we have been called, both casually and professionally. But becoming a grandmother? A precious time that might finally be our chance to claim something that actually fits.
Remember the names you’ve been called throughout your life? Honey. Sweetie. Tomboy. Brainiac. Hot chick. Ballbuster. B*tch. They all made me cringe. Maybe because they reflect how others see us, not how we see ourselves.
For many women, becoming a grandparent is the first opportunity to choose a name that reflects the person you see in the mirror. Your first name? That was picked by our parents. Sometimes the name fit; sometimes it was a “what were they thinking?” moment. And despite all the progress women have made, 79 percent of us in opposite-sex marriages still took our husband’s last name. Forget your professional reputation, your personal identity, or the reality of divorce rates, society—yes, I mean men—convinced us this is what women do.
But now? This one’s yours. You’ve built a life, a career, a reputation. You’ve earned every inch of who you are. So why would you settle for a default? Choose a grandma name as original and unmistakable as you.
Goodbye, Grandma. Hello, Queenie!
Grandma Isn’t a Job Title Anymore
For me, becoming a grandmother revealed something unexpected. As soon as word got out, dozens of women I knew—virtually andxf50 in real life—shared that they were grandmothers too. I never knew!
Turns out, women aren’t exactly leading with it anymore. Years ago, we just assumed women of a certain age were grandmothers, cuddly, domestic, and parked in their rocker watching The Price is Right—full stop. That was the first—and sometimes only—descriptor of them. It was both a role and a retirement notice.
Times have changed. Sure, we might daydream about lazy afternoons with grandkids and juice boxes—but that’s only part of the picture. Today, two-thirds of women between 55 and 64 are still working. Some because they have to. Many because they want to. Modern grandmothers are running businesses, creating art, running marathons, and going viral. They’re living longer and healthier lives filled with everything from wine clubs to Appalachian Trail hikes to holding political office. They’re mentoring, managing, and yes, even spoiling the next generation.
We’re not winding down. We’re just getting interesting.
After years of mothering and carefully curating our pre-grandma selves, becoming a grandmother doesn’t mean you disappear—it means you rebrand. Today’s grandmothers are proving you can be both cuddly and cool. And the clearest signal of the kind of grandmother you’ll be?
It starts with your name.
Rebranding Your Grandma Name: A Whole New Era
Gone are the days of automatically adopting a grandma name traditionally used by your family or in your community. Today’s new grandparents feel younger, sharper, and more alive than past generations—and want a name to reflect that energy.
With the average woman becoming a grandmother at 50, the search for the right name has gone digital. From Facebook videos with millions of views and TikTok options galore to online grandma name generators there’s no shortage of “help.” Viral Instagram reels like @Landontalks offer lots of humor and context to your choice. This once passive tradition has now turned into a full-on branding moment. Choosing your grandma name has become a whole thing. And it’s personal.
Name Yourself. Just Don’t Expect It to Stick.
Most of us are just trying to beat the clock before we get saddled with something we hate. I thought the name would come to me in a moment of grandmotherly clarity. It didn’t. Cut to the birthing room and I hear myself say, “Hi, buddy. My name is Nanny.” OMG, did I just say that? My mother is called Nan so it seemed like a perfect choice under pressure. Then a few months later when the parents started talking about “the Nanny” I realized my grandmother name is the same as the child care provider.
Did I make a branding error?
But I’ve decided to roll with it. I’ve learned that settling on a name doesn’t mean things will go according to plan. My mother-in-law was dead set on being called Grammy. Then one day, mid-drive, my toddler daughter randomly decided to call her Gabby. We begged her to say Grammy, not Gabby. She refused. And to her credit, my MIL took it in stride—though I’m fairly certain she thinks I planted the idea because, well, she talks a lot.
And if you’re planning to go full Bridgerton and crown yourself Dowager Violet, fair warning: It might sound less regal when your darling grand mangles it to “Dow” or worse … “Cow.” Oops.
Your Grandma Name Style Guide
Time to have some fun with this. Your grandma name can be traditional, quirky, cultural, or completely made up. So … who will you be?
Traditional
Love the classics? Try Grandmother, Grandma, Nana, Grammy, Granny, MeeMaw, MomMom. Or maybe a more modern twist like Nan, Nanny, Gam, G-mom, or the ever-glamorous Glamma.
Repeats
Want a name your grandchild can learn quickly? Try something on repeat: GoGo, GaGa, GiGi, Babba, Mimi, GamGam, BeBe, LuLu, LaLa, or Big Mama.
Cultural Roots
More and more new grandmothers are reclaiming names from their heritage. Abuela, YiaYia, Oma, Bubbie, Bobshie, Tita, and Nonna are all making a comeback. A friend recently chose Bacie, a name favored by our Polish great-grandmothers a century ago.
Nicknames
Have a name that lends itself to a twist? You’re in good company. My husband was pushing for JoJo but I couldn’t make the leap. Both Whoopi Goldberg (Oopi) and Catherine Zeta-Jones (ZeeZee) found theirs. Try a fun remix of your name: Babs, DiDi, JenJen, Shelly, Reni, SueSue.
Cute
Once your grandchild starts babbling, even the quirkiest name starts to sound like pure poetry. If cuteness overload is your vibe, try Honey, Lovey, Queenie, Goldie, Bunny, Kitty, Cookie, Coco, Daisy, Lolly (to go with a Pop in the picture).
Take Your Time
Whatever you do, don’t rush it. Don’t default. And definitely don’t panic-name yourself in a delivery room, like I did.
You’ve spent a lifetime answering to names chosen by other people—parents, partners, bosses, even strangers. This one is different. This one? It’s yours.
Choose a name that honors who you are now: bold, hilarious, battle-tested, becoming. Let them call you something that actually fits.
When my mother-in-law became a grandmother her first grandchild could not say grammy. She became Banny, and the next 9 grands called her that as well. I am grammy to my biological grands, and gram-mare to my steps. My dad’s mom was grammy to me, and my mom’s was nana. My cousins called my nana grammy.
My grandchildren call me cuckoo, some of my grandchildren are foster children and already have grandparents.
Hi Sue, Cuckoo is wonderful! Thanks for sharing. I just finally settled on SueSue. I will give that a try and see what the little guys turn it into!—susan
I don’t have any grand children yet, but have already announced that I will be ZuZu when the time comes. It’s a nickname for Susan.
My grandma was nicknamed Bug, shortened from Potato Bug because she loved potatoes as a child. When I came along my name for her was Buggie and that’s what her grandchildren called her.
“Potato Bug” is the most adorable origin story ever. I love that you turned it into “Buggie” – there’s something so perfect about grandchildren creating their own special names. Those nicknames that stick across generations are pure magic.Thanks for sharing. —susan
Thanks for a great article! When my daughter was expecting her first child, I knew I wanted to find a grandma name that really fit me, for the very reasons outlined here. Eventually I chose Mimsy and I love it. Though my grandson started out saying Mi-Mi (which would have been fine too), as soon as he got the hang of the S sound, he learned Mimsy. He’s three now, and will teach his baby brother my name some day.
I found the article both humorous and interesting. When my daughter was wheeled out of the delivery room fifteen years ago and I saw her for the first time with a baby in each arm, a girl and a boy, my son-in-law immediately announced.,
“Grammy meet your grandchildren”. They were our first grandchildren and both my husband and I were over the moon, beyond happy at that moment in time and did not pay much attention to my son-in-laws intro. His Mom, a grandmother of several herself was called Mom-Mom. Interestingly, we have seven grandchildren now and one family still calls me Grammy while the other families call me grandma so it seems I have two designated names.. My husband is called Grandpa, Pa, and Papa, a distinction he earned from each of the three families. We answer to all as you know every one of the grands ranging in age from fifteen down to four just melt our heart.
PS: I will definitely share this article with my daughter so when she becomes a ‘grandmother’ she’ll select the name unique to her.
Eileen, Thanks so much for sharing. I think I may head down a similar road. As many wise grandmothers before me have said, the name may very well happen organically with the child naming me. I am two months in with my precious grandson, and I think I have settled on a name. I am in test mode right now, to try it out while I still have time to change! Thanks again for sharing your story. —susan
Try ‘Glam-ma’ although just turning 79 I’m glad I’m Grammy as there are no expectations from my beautiful glamorous granddaughters had I been ‘Glam-ma. Whether intentional or not Susan you could definitely pull it off in a natural way. Congratulations on the baby and the upcoming grand as well.
Thanks Eileen! We can’t wait for the next one to arrive in mid-September. And BTW, you could pull off anything! S.
Call me NANA!
My grands call me Juju and I love 💕 it!!
The best names are the ones your grandkids give you. I’m proud to be Grandma, Tiny Grandma and Grape Mimi (which I will hate to lose when the 2 yr old learns to say Great). I wouldn’t want it any other way, even an occasional Grandma Dude is fine!
Entertaining as it is, this article is based on your opinion that Grandma is outdated and horrible. I have been Grandma for thirty years and every time I am so called, my heart swells with love. There’s no finer name around.
Hi Marlene, thanks for your comment. While I did not write the article, I am the editor-in-chief. I am facing the “what to call myself” question right now. And for me, Grandma does not fit. I don’t think it is dated or by any means horrible. I love the name Grandma and loved both my Nanna and my Grandma. But for me, it doesn’t feel right. And that is the point isn’t it? That we have the agency now, to be creative, and pick something that we like. My gran-kids will most likely call me what they like anyways, and my heart WILL swell with what ever they call me! Thanks for sharing you POV.
Yia-Yia for me, and I’m loving every minute of being a grandmother!
Great article except I disagree with the worry that your chosen name may not stick. If you train a baby by repeating your chosen grandmother name repeatedly (and I mean repeatedly) to them in that first year, by the time they start speaking, you can absolutely condition them to associate you with your chosen name and they will address you as such. 100%. It’s dependent how much effort you put into it. ❤️. In fact, what also happens is that when the baby is in the room other people – the babies parents friends etc… might also start addressing you by that new name. Initially it’s like a joke but then you’ve got the baby hearing it from all around further reinforcing it. My daughter literally calls me Babu and I call her Mama when my granddaughter is in the room. 😂😂